Excuses

I am doing nothing but WASTING THE PRETTY!~

I have so much beauty and because of the weight i've put on i cant' see it. Such a change from my previous posts of... "look at what i've accomplished" and "Im so proud of myself" ... I have gained almost all of the weight back that i took off in the summer.
I could write a whole long sob story about how im "stuck in a rut" and "i can't find the motivation" blah blah.. but im so fucking sick of this story. Im so sick of all my excuses.

Im not compeltely down on myself I do have to say that in the last year I have successfully proven to myself that significant weight loss is possible for myself, that I CAN make it to the gym and be a "workout" person. I have proven to myself that things are possible that I never thought were and I even came close to fulfulling some dreams.
At least I know now that these things are possible.

ok.. i really need to revamp this all. I need to change it up. I can't just come on here and blubber and wail about what a failure i am and how hard it is to lose weight. I need to set some minor goals for myself.

My goal for this week is to lose 2 lbs. today is tuesday. By next tuesday i will be 2 lbs lighter.
By the end of february i will fit back into my cute white shirt.
I will do this by going to the gym 3 times per week in february.

My friend chris is such an unbelieveable motivator. Thank yoU!

in following his advice i vow to make the decision. To not look back. to move forward from this point on.
"dont' dwell on the past" -- because i no longer exist in the past. The past no longer exists.

My dwelling privledges have been revoked...

HERE i go again.